Refrain yourself from saying these.
If there’s one thing that we’re all susceptible from, is that we tend to be affected by negative thoughts and actions than positive. A psychologist, Rick Hanson, Ph.D., and best-selling author of Hardwiring Happiness, said that negative comments from others are more likely to stay with us than positive feedbacks. From this, building positive interactions with one another is necessary to have a healthy and happy relationship.
In another study, clinical psychologist Alexandra Solomon, Ph.D., said that we need to be proactive about building a thick cushion of warmth and support so that we can weather the inevitable rough moments when they happen.
Here are the things you should never say to your partner to stay in a positive light despite the inevitable rough moments of a relationship.
“If you loved me, you would. . .”
“Why isn’t it like it used to be between us?”
“You’re acting just like your mother!” (or your father, or any other family member).
These simple words might trigger that words aren’t enough, that you were looking for actions from your significant other, that you wish things would be back to how they used to be, or probably provoke defensiveness in your partner.
“Love is hard work and bumps in the road are 100% inevitable.” according to a clinical psychologist. And also, “The challenge is to figure out how to work together against the rough patch instead of against each other.”
If there are days when you thought that you’ve said too much and not enough all at once, just stop for a moment, before saying other words that could hurt your partner. You have to let go of ‘winning’. Neither of you should win a fight if so, you’ve probably doing it wrong. By letting the both of you win, the relationship win.